RCIA, and shows I need to either catch up on or abandon

Today was week three of RCIA classes. We were in the Lower Chapel tonight, which was interesting because I had only a vague idea of where that was. I got it right, and showed up in the right place, which was a huge relief, but I felt like every move I made was ten times louder than usual. I feel that way most times I enter a church, with a few exceptions.

Anyway, we were discussing the hierarchy in the church and some of the history behind it, which was interesting. I still haven't reached the point where I'm incredibly comfortable or anything, but I imagine I'll be a little less anxious by the time the Holidays roll around.

At least, I hope so.

Speaking of holidays, I'm almost finished with the blanket, which means I'll have to cast on to one of my Christmas knits immediately following that. I'm thinking the shawl for Granma, and then maybe the socks for mom. I have to alter the pattern slightly, because she asked for socks like the yellow ones that I made, but with a fold over cuff. I'll probably add a few stitches and invert the pattern so that when she folds it over, the ribbing faces outwards as it should.

I left early for class this evening because I needed to run into Savannah and I know what a nightmare the traffic can be. I had to go to the mall to pick up a shirt that I had delivered to the store for Aunt D. She saw the one I had and really liked it. Anyway, while there I picked up a new wallet with Daryl from the Walking Dead on it.

Now I like the Walking Dead just fine, but I've really only seen about 4 episodes from the first season. And honestly, I like Daryl because, dude, he has a crossbow. A crossbow! I'm an archery fan, and I've been entertaining thoughts about getting a crossbow for years, as well as getting a better recurve bow (mine being a decent quality, but still cheap set). No compounds though. I firmly maintain that a compound bow is cheating.

Why isn't using a crossbow cheating? Because reload time sucks compared to a standard or compound bow. Accuracy is much improved, but reload is crap.

Anyway! Not the point here. The point is I like Daryl because I can actually see him surviving the apocalypse and I like that he uses a crossbow. That's about it. I still can't get over what an idiot Rick was in the first episode. Yeah, sure, he manned up and took charge, but he's still a bit of an idiot.

But this brings me to my tv problem. See, I don't watch a lot of television, and the stuff I do watch tends to be old (M*A*S*H, I Dream of Jennie, ect), travel related (Anthony Bourdain is my hero), food related, or nostalgia related (American Restoration, American Pickers, Pawn Stars). Add in a dash of Catholic tv, through in a few crappy action films and the entire Disney film collection and you have my film library.

There is a problem with that though. See, I like Doctor Who, I like Walking Dead, I like Sherlock, and Supernatural, and more.....but I don't keep up with the episodes, I'll watch half a season in a day and then not touch it for two months, and I see nothing wrong with spoilers and watch things out of order.

This, apparently, bothers people.

Now let's be honest. I care about what most people think about as much as I speak Greek, that is to say, not at all. However, I do care (stupidly, in this case) what my friends say, and this does bother some of them. So, choices? Either watch, or don't, and try not to get attached to characters you know next to nothing about (Daryl, for example). This is a bit of a problem because I've never cared, and truthfully, don't much care now except for one teeny tiny fact.

It makes me feel awkward.

Yep, say you like a show but only watch a few episodes sporadically and if that show has any sort of fan base some one will be willing to stone you for "not being a real fan". Now I know my friends won't do that, and their ribbing is friendly in nature, but other people aren't so understanding and God knows I'm not a nice person.

We're working on that, but it's very slow going because my brain-to-mouth filter doesn't always kick in before I say something mean.

TV shows can bring out the worst in people and telling them to take a long walk off a short pier is, for some reason, less acceptable than their form bullying.

So, do I watch the shows? Abandon them? Continue with my sporadic and out-of-order enjoyment?

Yeah, we'll go with option C. And hopefully, God will only place idiots in my path when He knows the filter is functioning.

Yours always,
Tara

Long days and sitting on edge

Last night was a longer than usual night, which means that today has been a very long and tiring day. I have been tired and short tempered all day, and my vocabulary has sounded like a drunken sailors....sadly, no alcohol was imbibed to aid my colorful language. Nor will it be for a few days, at most, because my mother is expecting to go into labor either tonight or tomorrow.

Apparently, my little sister has decided that she's waited long enough, thank you very much, and she's quite tired of waiting. Mom hasn't gone into labor yet, but she's in the early stages, so she's expecting it to start up very soon.

I'm both excited, and terrified.

I like kids. I will swear up and down, left and right, that children are monsters and I want nothing to do with them, but the truth is a little more complicated.

Truth is, until my parent's got divorced, it literally never occurred to me that I might not get married and have kids. I certainly didn't plan on going out and settling with the first fellow I found and having a litter of little people, but I did think that, one day, I would find some one and have an undetermined number of kids.

My parents got divorced, forcing me to question pretty much everything I thought I knew about love and marriage, and I swore left, right, and center that I was never getting married and never having kids to any one who even remotely suggested that I might one day want that.

Honest truth. I want that. I want to get married and have kids. I want to have that. Especially now, as I'm entering the Catholic church, because there's so much that I would love to experience. Christening and first communion and all those lovely little milestones that parents prepare their kids for and that I'd like, God willing, to one day prepare my own kids for.

The thing is, it's been so long, and I've said it for so long, that I actually feel a little awkward around kids now. And I'm not willing to admit it out loud to my family that, yes, I would one day like to have kids. But I'm going to have a little sister and I'm torn between being excited and being scared out of my mind because I haven't taken care of a baby since P was born ten years ago, and yeah, I won't be taking care of her all the time, but I will take care of her occasionally.

I want her to grow up to be what I'm not. I want her to be strong, and confident, and easy-going, and to be the kind of person that people love to love. I want her to have every opportunity in life because there are so many things that I never got to try and I wish that I could have tried them.

I want her to be the person who always makes the world better.

I also don't want to step on my mother's toes any because we already have a slightly precarious relationship, largely because we just don't operate on the same wave-length. My mother is emotional, and I'm more logical, and the two do not always go well together.

All the fun.

In other news, tonight was the second night of RCIA classes. Monsignor O'Neal was teaching us tonight. It was actually really nice. The teaching bit was a bit dull, we were going over the order of mass, but not in a way that really helps me. What would help me is a comprehensive understanding of when to sit and when to stand. I've about got the standing and kneeling bit figured out completely. I don't always have to look at the people around me for that part, but the earlier part I haven't got a figured out. Anyway, it was more of a breakdown of the different parts of the mass. The best part was the Monsignor himself. He's an older Irish gentleman, and he's got a great sense of humor.

Anyway, I'll talk to ya'll again tomorrow.

Yours always,
Tara

RCIA class #1 and the hunt for a small wall crucifix without a scary price tag

Ehem.

RCIA. The Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults. Let me be incredibly honest, in the hours leading up to this class, my stomach was in knots. Why? Because I'm not, by nature, an out going person. I like people, don't get me wrong. I like groups of people too. But only if I know them all and have at least a minimum level of friendship with them. So classes of any kind are a bit intimidating.

Of course, everyone reading this who has been through these classes at the Cathedral knows that there was really no reason to be worried. There were a few tables with chairs, extra chairs along the wall, and a grand total of about 40 or so people there. I didn't count.

I took along my knitting, but did not actually pull it out. I probably should have. Knitting helps to relieve nervous energy, and most people are more fascinated by it than annoyed by it. I think I've lost one of my needles in my floor though. St. Anthony has his work cut out for him helping me find it.

My room exists in a state of semi-permanent chaos, with a vague sense of organization where my craft supplies are concerned. I still have boxes that I haven't unpacked, and quite frankly might never get around to unpacking....which is all the more reason to unpack them, because I probably need to get rid of 95% of the stuff in the boxes.

Anyway! The class! Today was a basic intro class. Father Shrek (yes, I did spell that correctly, thank you....I think) gave us a small syllabus (yay!) to give us an idea of what we'll be covering and when we will be out of class, such as St. Patrick's Day. Smart move that one. Savannah is crazy on St. Pat's!  We start to actually get into things more next week.

He also mentioned the blessings thing. Many of you may recall that, for a time, I would go up to receive a blessing during the communion procession. I stopped after reading some stuff that implied that this recent tradition was not well received by those in authority. I'm still conflicted about the whole thing, and honestly, I'm probably going to go nuts trying to figure out what to do. According to Father Shrek, it's fine to do so. I'm still not sure whether I should, or whether I should stay in my seat.

There's some things that I do that I know a lot of people argue over, and frankly, for most of it, I can't really bring myself to care. There is no definitive "this is how it should be" so I figure, as long as I do my best to follow the rules, I'm fine. I'm not going to stop doing something just because a few people don't like it. But in this case, I'm not really sure what to think.

Now that I'm off on Tuesdays, my weekday mass service has been changed from Wednesday to Tuesdays. Added to this is a new exercise regime for Aunt D and I. After mass, we walk. Just, you know, where ever. We walked around for a few hours before stopping by Saints and Shamrocks. Every time I go in there I look at the wall crucifixes, and every time the price tags are scary.

I'm not sure why it is, but depending on the object, my "scary price tag" could be anywhere from $15 to $200. It all depends on the object. Restaurants where everything is $10 or more....scary price tags. A wall crucifix for $50.....scary price tag. A book for $30....scary price tag. Now that's not to say I never make purchases for things with "scary price tags" but I do try to keep it to a minimum. Scary price tags are called that for a reason, after all.

And honestly, I balk at spending $50 for most things. Which does not in any way negate the fact that I realize spending $100 for the complete M*A*S*H series plus the movie and a disc of bonus features is a really good deal. It just means that I still looked every where before finally making the purchase. What can I say? The joys of online shopping. I don't have to ask for help because it's already at my finger tips, I have the option of shopping multiple stores at the same time, and I don't have to deal with people. Brilliant.

Oh! Some quick shop news. While I will be doing a lot of work on personal projects, I am hoping to start on some items for the Etsy store shorty. It's my hope that I will be able to officially open for business by the end of October, beginning of November. I'll be sure to post a link when I open for business.

One thing I've been looking into is a metal casting service. Sadly, metal casting is a bit beyond my skills, but I'd really like to see a better medal for Our Lady Star of the Sea. The primary ones that I've found all look a little.....clinical. I can't help but think that any devotion to our Mother deserves to be a little more vibrant. Not necessarily colorful, but more detailed perhaps. Especially since we have so many beautiful medals for the saints, and other devotions to the Blessed Mother, easily available to us.

There's a lot of beautiful devotions to Mary that don't get a lot of attention. I'm not sure why, maybe because they aren't apparitions? But another really beautiful one is Our Lady of La Leche. I guess maybe I like that one so much because my mother breast fed my brothers, and will do so for my sister as well, but I just think it's lovely to see our Mother like that.

Anyway, I've gone off into rambling again. I really need to stop doing that. So I'm going to sign off, and call it a night. It's been a long, productive day.

Oh! Shameless plug for my favorite (well, a favorite) show on EWTN. Saints Alive! comes on tomorrow night at 5pm Eastern!

Goodnight all!

Yours always,
Tara

Music Box, Stella Maris, and lots of excitement.

So I finished the music box Saturday afternoon and I'm pretty happy with how it turned out. That's the outside. It's a fairly decent sized box that looks like a book.

I went into Photoshop and used some digital scrap-booking patterns and pictures to make the background, bought the little bird and the dragons at Michael's (a container with six dragons cost the same as one large dragon), and got the string lights and music box online. The cover that the bird is sitting on is just some cardboard that I covered with glittery scrapbook paper. Hot glue and staples were very helpful. I have some ideas of what I'm doing now, so the next one should look better.

I want to find a different way to secure the lights though. The staples stuck out and then had to be pushed in and it just....it works, but I'd like something better.

I'm also trying to figure out if I should try to illuminate the smaller ones. Yeah, I'm going to make some smaller ones. I've got an idea of how I want to go about it, so now I just have to give it a shot. I'm thinking something Phantom of the Opera-esque.

There's the inside of the bird's perch. Inside is the battery operated switch for the lights and music box movement itself. I bought the ones in the case because at the time when I bought them, I wasn't really sure what I was going to do with them.

I think, after mine, I'll just purchase the movements, sans cases, and make something for it myself. For one thing, this will save space, and for another, it won't be as difficult to work with.

Ha! It worked! Sorry, been having a little trouble with getting my pictures where I want them to be. That's the one thing I'm not fond of with most blogging sites. I know where I want my picture, just let me put it there!

Anyway, that's my terrible artwork you see to the right. I was trying to keep it within an oval shaped frame, like most of the medals you see, but um....well, I decided making our Blessed Mother look as good as my (really poor) skills would allow was bit more important. I tried.

There's a few things I like about this picture. The sea doesn't look as bad as I had thought it did. And I manages not to completely mess up the hands....I think.

Other than that, I think it's terrible. Really and truly terrible.

I'm a little disappointed at how little there is for Our Lady Star of the Sea. I mean, I know it's not the most popular title our Mother has, but still! It's one of the oldest Marian devotions there is! And it's a beautiful one too.

Although, I'll be honest, part of why I love it might be because I love nautical stuff, despite the fact that I'd sink like a rock.

Anyway, tomorrow is the start of RCIA classes. I'm so excited! I can't wait! I'm also vaguely terrified because *eek* people! but I'll survive. I'm meeting Aunt D for Morning mass, followed by breakfast and walking, then I'm running some errands for my mother, and then who knows what I'll do until time to leave for class.

Can you tell I'm excited? I'm thrilled!

I'll tell you all about it tomorrow!
Yours Always,
Tara

A Truly Brilliant morning!

I decided to go to mass this morning, despite a late night (12:50) and having gone yesterday and I'm so glad that I did!

Immediately following mass I ran outside to put a quarter in the meter (mass ends about 7 minutes before 8, which is when the meter starts to really be an issue) and met a lovely lady who I shall simply refer to as Aunt D. Aunt D is new, and moving here shortly. I actually saw her at mass yesterday, but I was in a rush yesterday (bad Tara!) and didn't say anything. Today though, it turned out really well.

While we where talking, I was led to give her the Our Lady Star of the Sea chaplet that I made. I paid the meter and went inside to sit in front of Mother Mary and finish the rosary I had started to say before mass began (I can usual get a decade or so in before mass starts), and then Aunt D and I went to breakfast.

There's this really nice Parker's on Drayton that I call the Fancy Parker's because it's got all sorts of little gourmet or really high quality food items, and we went there and had breakfast. It was really nice because we sat and talked for about an hour before I showed her where Saints and Shamrocks (the closest thing we have to a Catholic bookstore, as far as I know) and then parted ways.

There are two things that make this whole thing so fantastic! Number one is how happy Aunt D was! She loved the chaplet! And was so happy to just sit and talk over breakfast. Second great thing is that I got an aunt out of it! I love when you just click with people and become friends! And when you become family? Brilliant!

Of course, I'm at work now. Speaking of! I just picked up 8 more hours so I am officially full time again! Isn't that great? And my boss and I have already talked about me having Tuesdays off come September for the RCIA classes.

There's also a place not to far from the church that has beginner's Irish dance classes about an hour before the RCIA classes, so I'm hoping I can take that, and the RCIA, plus pick up a class or two for the fall mini-mester at STC.

Yeah, I gave up on trying to be really sneaky about where I'm at. Anyone who knows South Georgia worth a fig knows where the Cathedral of St. John the Baptist is. No point hiding it. I live within easy driving distance of Savannah, Ga.

Anyway. Aunt D and I also saw the strangest thing while in the Fancy Parker's. Giant Wooden Rosary beads. And I don't mean like the ones you get for teaching toddlers to pray the rosary (no, I'm not secretly looking at baby stuff in the hopes of one day having progeny of my own despite telling my parents and everyone else that I am "never having kids", not at all *pfft*) I mean like 4 1/2- 5 ft long rosaries made of 1/4 in to 1/2in wooden beads and a 2 1/2 in long crucifix. And it was white.

Weirdo that I am, I'm tempted to go back and get one, just because it's such an interesting rosary, though I'll be honest, I'd probably have it a week before attacking it with brightly colored acrylics. Either way, I'm leaving it be for now. I can probably make one myself, or find one else where cheaper.

Aunt D also gave me a lovely turquois and gold rosary over breakfast. We were talking about it (because of the giant wooden ones) and I mentioned my strange relationship with rosaries (I partially blame them for the fact that I'm converting) and she just pulled it out and gave it to me. It was nice. I'm going to pray with it tonight just for her.

We talked about a lot of things. Her daughter, my mother, my pub that I want to open, her parents, and it was brilliant! I'm so glad that it happened. Nothing like this ever happened while I was attending the Baptist church. I feel like today is just a taste of what might be in my future if I allow it to be.

I'm also incredibly thankful for second chances, because I could have given it to her yesterday, but because of my nervousness and rushing I missed the chance. But God and Mother Mary (yes, I know she had a hand in this whole thing, it's got her name written all over it!) knew that we both needed this, and it all worked out!

Aunt D is headed back to her home to tie up lose ends, and then she'll be moving to Savannah and I'm so excited! It'll be nice to know someone at the Cathedral when I go (Besides Mr. J, I mean. I don't see him every time). I'm thinking about maybe inviting Father Shrek over for dinner one day, but that I think can wait for a little while. It's not like I live alone, after all, and my granma might be opposed to that. I don't think she would be, but it's best to make sure, you know?

Downside to the new hours is that I have to reschedule my appointment with the tattoo artist. I don't really mind to much, I mean, those hours will help me out a lot, but at the same time, I'm really interested in seeing what she did with my (really pitiful) rough draft. and to talk color. Of course, H is still a little disappointed that I haven't gone to see her guy (because he's the best, obviously) but I like this place. It's where I got my first tattoo (same artist too) and I was really pleased with it. It's also really close to the mall, so when I (inevitably) get the munchies after getting inked, I have lots of options.

Also, I'm almost finished with the stole! I'm a little more than half-way through the crocheted edging and boy does that make me feel like I'm all thumbs! I miss my knitting needles! It's been a while since I last crocheted anything, so I feel so awkward! But it's good practice for that sweater I really want to make. As soon as I finish I'm going to finish the other bootie and then make my socks! Then a pair of mittens and a hat, followed by Christmas knitting! I've got the yarn and the pattern for a lovely butterfly shawl for my granma (she loves butterflies) and that's where I'll start. Then socks for Sasquatch, and part one of the knitted advent calendar, that is to say, the garland it sits on. Hopefully by then I'll have money again and can buy the yarn for Little Bird's Christmas stocking and P's socks, as well as the eyelash yarn for Little Bird's dress. I've also still got to make her pumpkin hat. That, thankfully, will not be as bad as that awful cabbage patch hat.

Wow, I've written a lot tonight. I am so sorry. You are all wonderful for reading this far!

So, question time! Have you ever had something happen that just had Mother Mary's hand-writing all over it? Have you ever had a priest over for dinner before? Let me know! I'd love to hear from you!

Yours always,
Tara

Tiny Saints, Bad Catholics, and Cabbage patch dolls

My Shining Light Dolls came today. I left St. Nicholas at home, but I brought St. Patrick with me. It's nice to have him sitting on the computer smiling at me while I work. It's silly, but it makes me smile every time I look at him.

I've also been reading more of my Bad Catholic's Guide series. I haven't finished Wine, Whiskey, and Song yet, but I'm also reading a little bit of Good Living. I adore the writing. The humor alone is worth the price, and you don't have to be Catholic, or even considering Catholicism to really enjoy them.

In other news, I've also started on a hat for Little Bird that looks like a Cabbage Patch Dolls hair. Pigtails and yarn loop bangs. Yarn loops! Do you have any idea how hard it was to get that awful loop stitch? Ugh! I was so thankful that St. Patrick is the patron of Ireland and has heard far worse than my grumbling as I tried to make this stupid stitch work. I finally got it right, and I apologized for my less than charitable thoughts toward the inventor of the Loop stitch, the writer of the pattern, and my yarn, but still.

While my tiny Saint keeps smiling, I'm sure St. Patrick himself is continually rolling his eyes at me.

I'm hoping to finish this hat before I drop my truck off to get the alignment fixed, that way I can give it to my mom along with the blanket I bought for Little Bird. It's purple and green and has two little birds at the bottom. It's so cute! And not pink!

Why is EVERYTHING for little girls pink? You have to wait until they hit 1yr. before you get other color options! (Unless you're buying green or yellow, green and yellow are, apparently, gender neutral.) It's a color! Why? Have I mentioned how much I hate assigning genders to colors?

Do you realize that pink was considered a boy color up until the 1950s? and that the only reason it changes is because the Nazis had homosexuals in the concentration camps wear pink triangles? Blue was a girl color, because it was considered calming and delicate.

They are colors! It doesn't matter pink or blue! It's a color! How ridiculous!

Not that I'm against pink. I mean, it's not my favorite color or anything, but I don't mind it. It's just that I find it ridiculous how all that you can find, for the most part, is a wall of pastel pink!

It's a bit much, by my way of thinking.

I did make an appointment with the doctor. It's not until September, but I'll be able to make it until then. I'm hoping that, if I watch what I'm eating, I might be able to avoid a repeat performance of this morning.

Truthfully, it was easier to make the appointment than I had thought it would be. The lady on the other line was very helpful, and it made it easier. I'm still not happy about it, but such is life.

I would appreciate your prayers, especially since I have to get up early tomorrow morning. I'm praying for a good day tomorrow. If I make it to morning mass, I usually have a good day after wards.

I'm going to call it a night, and get to work on that Cabbage patch hat.
Yours always,
Tara

A truly profitable if somewhat hectic day

As has become my custom, I dragged my tired and lazy body out of bed at 6 o'clock in the morning to get ready for mass. Truthfully, I could leave it until 6:30, because I usually only take about 5 minutes to get ready anyway, but getting up at 6 gives me time to check my email (I get the Morning Offering from the Catholic Company) and maybe grab some toast with a liberal amount of marmalade if I'm so inclined.

Mass was lovely, as always. It's nice to get there a little early, and see how the alter glows when they turn the lights up. I'm still stumbling my way through mass, but everyone is kind enough not to say anything.

After  mass I got some breakfast and walked through the cemetery reading the plaques until the office opened at 9. They weren't there, so I killed another 15 minutes walking to the nearest store and getting some tea before heading back. I went ahead and put my name down to be contacted about the RCIA classes in September, and I already talked to my boss about working on a different day so I can attend the classes.

This was followed by a quick stop at the catholic store, where I got a new rosary and another guide to mass, as I gave the other one to L. I had to rescue my scarf (with it's tempting tassels) from an adorable dog at the catholic store, I then proceeded back to the Cathedral for a few moments of prayer before braving traffic in Savannah.

I then headed to my college to pick up my Serve Safe certificate and stopped by Michael's to pick up some chain and wire for the OL Star of the Sea chaplet (rosary? chaplet? we shall see) and while there picked up brown yarn for a cabbage patch doll hat for Little Bird. I also swung by World Market and picked up a fork, spoon, and plate for work. I'll add a coffee cup a little later in the season....and possibly a tea pot and cozy.

I purchased two of the Shining Light dolls last night. St. Patrick and St. Nicholas will be arriving tomorrow, along with a cute little purple and green bird themed baby blanket. I might get OL of Knock and OL of Lourdes later. I'll be honest, I still really want the plush St. Patrick.

Speaking of plush toys, my beloved teddy bear, who has slept in my bed and kept monsters at bay for nearly 20 years, is in need of repair....again. His heads coming off again. This time on the other side. I've decided to cut all the strings and just reattach it all the way around instead of trying to do a patch job. It's a terrifying thought, but it needs to be done.

I also received my books today. I received the following:
The Bad Catholic's Guide to a Good Life
The Bad Catholic's Guide to Wine, Whiskey & Song
The Bad Catholic's Guide to the Catechism
The Protestant Dilemma
Rediscovering Catholicism
Vampire Knits
and the movie Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

So far I've already read the Protestant Dilemma, which pointed out things I already knew about Protestantism and gave the Catholic truth (jury still ou...oh who am I kidding? We all know how this will end!) instead. I've also started in on The Bad Catholic's Guide to Wine, Whiskey & Song.

Can I just say how much I love this book? It's funny! It has all sorts of lovely little tidbits and a fantastic flow. And the jokes regarding the subject (such as suggesting that Frenchmen burning a liquor producing Abbey as being proof of the reality and activity of Satan) make it an entirely too funny read!

That, I think, is one of the more brilliant aspects of Catholicism. It's summed up in a quote I've heard a few times "Wherever the Catholic sun doth shine, there's always laughter and good red wine".  There's a fantastic love and enjoyment for life in the Catholic church when it's following it's own teachings. Protestants can often forget that we are allowed to enjoy.

Oh! I mentioned earlier I bought a new rosary. It's truly a practical move. I bought a fairly plain and inexpensive one to use instead of my Connemara rosary because marble is not a very good material to make a rosary (or truthfully much of anything else) out of. Use of it causes the marble to break down over time, and I'd like to keep it in good condition for as long as possible. The new one is nice enough for what I paid, but the Aves and Paters look more or less the same, and I tend to prefer there be a noticeable difference between them.

Anyway, that's my Wednesday. Tomorrow I've got cleaning and a few more packages, more reading to do, and another baby knit project to cast on. I'm not sure if I should do the booties, the mittens, or the last hat. I've already made a blue hat and a green hat. I'm thinking of doing the booties, and then ignoring her if she suggests that they need to be any longer. I'm extending them by a few stitches, not so much that it'll make it to hard to adjust the pattern, but enough to add the extra inch or so.

Still tempted just to throw the yarn at her.

Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow!
Yours always,
Tara

Planning for a busy day

Tomorrow promises to be a busy day. As is my usual practice, I intend to get up early and go to morning mass at the Cathedral, followed by a variety of errands to run. After mass, I'll grab a bite to eat, and then head to the little Catholic store. This requires I find some productive way to waste about an hour until they open, but I need to pick up a few things, including a rosary made of something a little less delicate than marble. After that I need to swing into Savannah and pick up my Serve Safe certificate, and pick up some yarn and beads. I'm actually thinking about just getting a small crucifix at the store, and then picking up some beads to make another rosary.

I'll be honest, with a few exceptions, I have a hard time buying anything I can make. I'd much rather buy the parts and make it myself. I think this is because making things relaxes me. I also need to pick up bronze chain and eye-pins for the OL Star of the Sea chaplet I have planned. Although, I'm not sure it will be a chaplet, or if it will become a rosary. I was actually thinking about using shells, either as the Aves or the Paters, I hadn't decided yet.

I'm really excited though. My books are supposed to arrive tomorrow, thanks to free Prime two-day shipping. I can't wait to get started reading!

I'm also not sure what to do regarding the priest/RCIA situation. Tomorrow is the day I start calling again, and honestly, I'm so tired of calling that I'll probably just ask if there is a priest who can work with me, and if not, just sign up for the classes and call my boss. Hopefully, some one will be willing to work with me!

I also need to work more around the house. Friday I plan on doing a full clean, since I'm not working, but to do a full clean, I really need to get the majority of the stuff on my bed room floor up and put away. I might need to stop by Goodwill and see if I can't find a hat stand, and maybe see if I can't get that drawer pushed under my bed.

I still have several things of books and clothes to unpack. As I'm unpacking, I really need to go through and take out anything to small or unwanted, without arguing to myself. If I'm going to keep it for the quilt, I need to place it with the rest of pieces.

Truthfully, when I had moved, I had hoped to avoid exactly this. Unfortunately, it all sort of piled together and I don't really know where to put everything because ideally, I'd be able to put everything in a drawer, or on a shelf, and that'd be it. But that's not really how it works. I need more bookshelves, but I have no place for them even if I did get them.

Actually, now that I think about it, it might be a good idea to measure the area by my bead, and maybe move my bed slightly to put a bookshelf there. That would give me more storage. I just can't move the bed to much, or I won't be able to get into my dresser. I mean, I can't reach the bottom drawers right now anyway, but that's the winter clothing, so it's not an immediate concern.

My grammar teacher would be appalled by the over abundance of Is at the beginning of sentences. It's not intentional, but I'm trying to get all of my thoughts in order, and sadly you, dear readers, have to deal with it. Well, if you choose to stick around for it, that is.

Anyway, here's hoping things work out well tomorrow, and I'll talk to you then!
Yours always,
Tara

Wow, where is my mind today?

I've just been forgetting things left and right and it's getting ridiculous! Okay, so, first thing first, I almost forgot to place the order for the parts of the chaplet for Our Lady Star of the Sea that I have planned. Then, I forgot to tell you guys how mass with L went on Sunday. And then, to top it off, as I was leaving for work I forgot my water bottle, my plate, and a fork! How ridiculous is that?

Thankfully, I've remembered to cancel my subscriptions to ancestry.com and idisciple. I was using idisciple for the daily reading, but I have a free app, Laudate, that has the daily reading, the rosary, and more. I still have Netflix and Catholic Answers Live, but that's about it. Next month, my phone bill goes up by $5 when I switch from my mom's contract to prepaid. I'm not too worried about it. Other than getting my front end alignment fixed on Friday, and some bronze chain and jump rings for the chaplet, I don't have anything else to purchase.

I'm not sure if I want to keep my Amazon Prime account. I don't use it very often, mainly because I buy the absolute cheapest one possible, which is often not the Amazon Prime option. I made use of it this time, mainly because the books I wanted, The Protestant Dilemma, The Bad Catholic's Guide (all three of them) and Rediscovering Catholicism were all just as cheap to buy the Prime version as to buy the lowest price and then add shipping. I also got Vampire Knits and Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

I love Monty Python. It's a guilty pleasure that I enjoy, especially with a little alcohol involved. Not that it need alcohol, it's hilarious without it, but a little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.

Oh! I'm a terrible person, I'm sure! So, about a month ago I made a Guinness Chocolate Cheesecake (it didn't cook quite long enough, giving the center a more pudding like texture) and it tasted great. But that's not the terrible part. The terrible part is what I was so so so tempted to do!

See, my mother's church does Sunday school on Sunday evenings, and in each class there is food. And they like to spring it on you to bring something, little to no advanced warning, unless they remember to put out the sign up sheet (and even then...). So I had the absolutely terrible idea (though I didn't follow through) to take the cheese cake to church, and when asked what it is, to say "Guinness Chocolate Cheesecake". Now, given the nature of Southern Baptists, there would be someone who would comment on the sinfulness of alcohol, to which I would respond "Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker!" (thank you Mr. Willy Wonka!)

Thankfully, I never did that, but it was really tempting! I could just imagine the looks on their faces! I can also count on one hand the number that would laugh at it! Even the fun loving ones can be so uptight sometimes! I guess that's just people for you though.

Anyway! Sunday mass with L. We went to the second service they offer, and sat fairly close to the back. Thankfully we had the pew to ourselves, so there was no shuffling and tripping when it came time for the Eucharist (we just stayed where we were, given that neither of us are Catholics), and we weren't so far back we didn't have kneelers. My knees were still killing me though, but that's because I walked to a low table Saturday.

But anyway, we fumbled along as best we could, I more so than her because I actively try to participate, and she was content with just sitting when they sat and kneeling when they kneeled and so on. It was good though. It was nice to have her go with me.

I slipped up though! I generally tell people that I have no desire to marry and have children, largely because I'm not looking, not because I'm not interested. And the more someone says that I'll change my mind, the louder I say it. Truth is, I wouldn't mind getting married and having kids. And unfortunately I slipped up and let her know that. Damn! I did swear her to secrecy though (and that goes for all of you as well, dear readers!) so it shouldn't go any further than that. I'll slip up with the rest of my friends eventually, but right now....eh.

I know I said I'd wait until Wednesday, but I'm really tempted to just call the Cathedral tomorrow, and if they don't have a priest who can work with me, then sign up for the RCIA classes and talk to my boss about changing the schedule in September. I'm not a patient person, truthfully.

I'm planning on going to mass Friday, but honestly, I'm a little nervous. I've been to weekday mass, and Sunday mass, but I'm pretty sure that this is going to be a little more if that makes sense. Hopefully there will be something in the Let us Keep the Feast books to give me an idea of what to expect.

I've got one baby hat done. Tomorrow I'll try to knock out the other one, and hopefully I'll be able to get the striped one done on Wednesday. If all goes well, then Thursday I'll start on a new pair of booties. I still have a pair of mittens too though. One more thing I'd almost forgotten.

I really want to get started on my Christmas knitting.

Good night, dear readers, I'll talk to you in the morning.
Yours always,
Tara

Confusion on top of confusion

So, in my post on Wednesday, I mentioned that, after being advised to do so by the priest, I had started going up for a blessing. On a whim, I decided to search the practice online tonight. Enter my confusion! It seems that this practice is fairly new, and, while currently under review, is generally held, by the officials in charge, as being a malpractice that should cease.

I can kind of understand why it started, and I can kind of understand why, according to those in charge, it should stop, but honestly, I'm so confused about the entire thing! You know, dear readers, that I like having my proverbial ducks in a row, so confusion and I are not good friends. I'm now left wondering what I should do! I'm not sure whether to follow the advice of the priest (whom I've yet to hear back from) or follow the (not yet official) stance of Congregation for Divine Worship and the Discipline of the Sacraments! It's not a big deal tomorrow since we're going to the cathedral, I'll just stay in the pew as I did before, but if I start going to the other parish, I'm not sure what to do.

Any thoughts from you, dear readers?

I'm hoping the priest will get back to me before Wednesday, otherwise I'll call. If I still don't get anywhere, I'll start calling around.

Anyway, just thought I'd post that, maybe see if anyone wants to weigh in.
Yours always,
Tara

A slow night

I am so bored! It's a slow night here, and it's driving me nuts!  The good side of it is that I can turn the volume up on the computer and listen to Catholic Answers Live, which is nice, but there's usually more going on at this time.

Really, I can't complain, I do enjoy the quiet. It's just a little disconcerting when you aren't expecting, or even hoping for it. (In fact, if you spend more than a day around small children, unexpected silence quickly becomes something dreaded, something I haven't yet gotten over)

Either way, I'm still bored, so that's no help. Idle hands, so to speak. I could knit. I'm less than halfway through a pair of baby booties, but truthfully, I just don't feel like working on them. I have to, I want them done by Sunday so I can give her the booties and the mittens I made earlier this week, I just don't want to work on them.

I've still been attending the evening Sunday school at my mother's church, even while attending mass on Sunday mornings. Part of this is just to see my mother, part of it is because, as much as I think I'm going to swim the Tiber, so to speak, I can't definitively say just yet. And part of it, dear readers, I shamefully, and shamelessly, confess, is because they feed me dinner.

Yep, free food.

My friend Cas has two boys, and the youngest of them apparently thinks it's awesome that his mom can repay me (for picking him up or other such things) with food.

The way I see it, free food is good food. There are a few notable exceptions, and I am careful of where I fix my plate, but generally, if you tell me there will be free food, I will go. I might not listen (several school functions come to mind) but I will eat.

This may, of course, be the wrong thing to do, but I'm 21, almost 22, food is a big priority.

Of course, H would glare at me. For all that I often think with my stomach (even going so far as to navigate by restaurants), I still don't eat as much, or as fast, as she does.

It's actually terribly funny, because we'll go out to eat at this Mexican joint, and they will all order the lunch specials, and I'll have one little chicken enchilada and some chips. Afterwards, as we leave, I'll mention how stuffed I am, and she just glares at me. I'm also usually one of the last ones to finish eating, which I imagine helps.

I also really need to work on my room. It's a bit....well, a lot, of a mess, and it's long since passed ridiculousness.

I guess tonight is just going to be a slow night. Just a short post. I can't promise I'll be back tomorrow morning, but I will definitely post tomorrow night. I have to tell you how mass with L goes!

Yours always,
Tara

Didn't go to mass this morning. Actually, I slept through my alarm, which is what happens, dear readers, when you stay up until  2am reading a book. I still had one chapter left when I went to bed, but I thought, for some reason, I would still be able to get up and go to mass. Truthfully, I probably could have. I have the vague feeling that I did actually hear the alarm go off, but in much the same way as I vaguely recall my dad coming in to give me a kiss on the head before he left for the Box at 5am when I was a small child. He did, and I sort of woke up, but I didn't really wake up, you know?

Or being woken up at 4am to lay with my little brother while Mom went to the hospital to give birth to my youngest brother. I actually had to get out of bed for that, still wasn't really "awake".

Anyway, vague childhood memories aside, I didn't wake up, and so missed mass.

Speaking of mass! I'm so excited! My friend L is going with me to mass on Friday! I'm going to pick her up so we can ride together, cut back on gas prices and such, but still!

The little voice in the back of my head has pointed out how strange it is that I'm not Catholic, and yet I'm incredibly excited about her going to mass with me. I should probably just accept it, huh?

I read Rome Sweet Home by Scott and Kimberly Hahn, in fact I actually just finished the last chapter (which was all that was left after reading until 2am like an idjit). Some of the theological aspects went a little over my head, I mean, yeah, I find theology interesting, but it's not my passion in life. Of course, I've also never been faced with suddenly finding that the church I was against is THE Church.

I'll be honest, I was in middle school before I realized that there was any difference between Catholics and Protestants. That's actually why I was so worried about my mother's reaction. It wasn't my text books that introduced me to that concept, although it ran rampant through my middle school and high school texts (I was home schooled) but my mother and her disdain for Catholicism.

Anyway, I enjoyed the book. It was especially nice to see both sides of the story, Mr. Hahn's and Mrs. Hahn's.

I'm still going to be doing Saturdays with the Saints, despite the fact that I'm no longer working on Saturdays. In fact, it might actually be better, now that I have to make time for it, rather than using it as an enjoyable way to kill time until I can go home.

There was one thing about the book that got me, and I've heard it in a lot of conversion stories. Mr. Hahn had such a hard time finding someone who had the answers to his questions. I guess I don't understand it very well, because the Baptist church my mother attends is big on evangelism, but it seems like, if you want into the Catholic church, you have to beat on the door for a while, before someone hears you knocking. It can be very frustrating for non-Catholics because we have questions, and we need answers, and guidance. Every parish near me has RCIA classes, but beyond that, what is there? What is there for those people who can't make it to the classes? I've finally found a priest who will work with me, but why was it so hard to find him?

If you are in the Church, if you are a leader in the Church, if you are a layman, even, please, as an interested individual, please, even if all you do is take pity on the first timer ("This is my first time" "At our parish, or at mass in general?") and help us stumble through, please try to reach out to us. I can't tell you how much it would help.

Well, that's all for now. I'll talk to you all again later.
Yours always,
Tara

Punctured balloons and the importance of positive thought

My day started off really good. An early start to the day, mass, coffee with a friend, and my copy of Rome Sweet Home by Scott Hahn arrived! All in all, a good and profitable morning. This trend continued on into the evening. Until about an hour ago when my boss informed me that he was cutting a full day off of my work week, taking my time for the week, starting next pay-period, from 42hrs to 32 hrs.

Now, my paycheck will still be sufficient for my needs, thank God, but that's still a roughly $200 dollar pay cut. I've already canceled my ancestry.com account, so that'll help, and once I fix the front end alignment on my truck, I really don't have any major purchases. I have decided to start looking for a new job, and who knows? Maybe I'll be able to get a job that will allow me to take part in RCIA classes, which would be nice.

With all of this said, I have decided that I am NOT! going to let this destroy the good mood I've had since mass this morning, and I'm thinking I might go to mass tomorrow morning too! I think I might be able to finish my book by tomorrow too!

It's so interesting to read how Mr. Hahn and his wife went from being die-hard Protestants, to being Catholic. Honestly, the more I read and research, the more it looks like the right way. Jury is still out though. I'll keep you posted.

In other news, I'm considering applying for a temp job overseas. I've decided that I'll do some research, ask some questions, and if it's a good deal, I'll apply. I'll hold off until at least January, longer if I do decide the road to Rome is right, and then if it's all good, I'll go for it.

The job's in Germany, which is great, because I lived there for six years and I loved it. I'm not very fluent in German, but I can work on building my fluency better in Germany than I can here in the States, and language fluency at level 3 or 4 would look good on a resume, right? I'd like to eventually achieve level 5 fluency, but I'm not even sure I'm level 5 fluent in English so I'm not holding my breath.

It's also pretty close to the area I lived in before, so I've got a pretty good idea of what to expect. They'll pay airfare and provide lodging. I'm actually hoping, if I do go, that my sister will go with me and we can room together, because that'll be pretty awesome!

All in all, I guess the best thing I can do is ask, dear readers, that you pray for me. Pray I find my way, and pray for open doors, and if I can not have open doors, pray for open windows!

Yours always,
Tara

What joy is in the Blessing!

Have I mentioned how much I love morning mass? I mean, there are fewer people, so if I goof up, it's a lot more noticeable, but there are also fewer people to see, and they're kind enough to not point it out. Anyway! Not the point!

Normally, when I go to mass, I just sort of sit awkwardly during the Eucharist because, well, I'm not Catholic, but I was advised that Tuesday that I could go forward and receive a blessing (I'd heard that you could do such, but I generally don't trust the internet), so I did so this morning. Aside from the initial nerves (which is pretty close to my usual state), it was fantastic! I've had warm fuzzy feeling ever since!

After mass I decided to kill some time until a certain store opened up. I'm pretty sure it's the closest thing to a Catholic book store we have, which is kind of sad, but I picked up a few things, including a pocket guide to mass! It's meant for kids, but still! This is what I've been hoping to find for a month now!

Anyway, killing time! I ran into a...friend? Acquaintance? Some one I knew, and we had coffee, and walked around until the store opened. Aside from the little guide, I picked up two little saint medals, St. Brigid and Blessed Teresa, a saint card for St. Dymphna to send to my sister along with the chaplet, a card of Mary with Hail, Holy Queen on the back (in hopes of helping me memorize it), and a small crucifix for a rosary. 

When I finished up there, my friend and I walked back to the Cathedral. He's never been inside before! How can you be near a church like that for months and never go in? Or am I just weird? I'm just weird, never mind. 

There's an older gentleman who always sits outside the front door. I think he's homeless, but he's very nice. I like to talk to him when I can spare the time. Apparently he had a rough night last night, which I don't really understand. He's such a nice person, I don't know why anyone would want to hurt him or cause him trouble. 

Anyway, bet that sounds incredibly naive, doesn't it? 

I've got to figure out what I want for lunch, and what to pack for dinner, as well as finish some laundry. I'll talk to you later!

Yours always,

Tara

My first pair of socks and a meeting with a priest

So, going in chronological order here, last night I finished my first pair of socks!

Okay, so the picture isn't the best, but still! Look! I made socks!

I am so ridiculously pleased by this fact. I mean, I love weird socks! Crazy colors, patterns, you name it. Well, I'm not fond of socks with individual toes, but that's just a personal preference. I feel ready to take on more challenges now! Today socks, tomorrow mittens! And then baby dresses! And maybe a sweater! 

But I'd better pace myself. My knitting list is already about half-a-mile long. Still, I made socks.

They are not, of course, without flaws. The gusset on the outside of the left foot is a little wonky looking, and I think I dropped a stitch on the leg of the right one and then picked it up like two rows later or something. I don't really know. The point is that I finally made socks! I did the heel flap and turned the heel, and I did lovely little cables which required I juggle six needles and they turned out really well! I've still got about a quarter of the one skein left, and then an whole skein that hasn't been touched. Maybe I'll try making a hat, for me, not for a baby. 

I have to finish the baby knitting first though. Two pairs of green mittens, one pair of blue booties, three hats: blue, green, and striped. Then I have to make a pumpkin hat, and I then I can start working on Christmas knitting!

Anyway, I just got back from a local parish. I went to morning mass first and I wish they had of put on the website that they say the rosary in the mornings! I'd have been there earlier for that! I caught the last decade, and managed to stumble along with them. I've memorized Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be, still struggling with Hail Holy Queen. Anyway, went to mass, the people were friendly, but not smothering. Afterwards, met with the priest.

This is the meeting I've been in knots over since Thursday, dear readers. Obviously, I was worried for no reason, but as you learn quickly, I'm naturally a nervous Nelly. It went pretty well. I had to really think about what he was saying because English isn't his first language, but if he could overcome the struggle of learning a new language, the least I can do is to try my best to understand him. 

He's going to try to put me in touch with the deacon in charge of the RCIA program so that he has my information and so that there's a support team of sorts (and he encouraged me to drop in on every class I could), but said that, if I don't hear back from the deacon by the end of the week, to email him back, and he'll take care of it. 

I'm actually kind of excited. I've been trying to get in touch with someone for about a month, and now, finally! I see results!

All in all, I'm pleased. I still prefer the cathedral, but that might be because it's big enough that no one notices me fumbling along in the back. 

Wednesday I'll go to the Cathedral for mass, just because otherwise, I won't be able to go. School starts back that day, and we live right across from an elementary school. At the time I'd have to leave for any of the other parishes, it'd be almost impossible to get out at our road. But Sunday I'll go back to this one, and I might go on Friday. 

Speaking of the rosary (well, that was a few paragraphs up, but still, bear with me) I've been making use of EWTN's broadcast of the rosary every night at 9:30. It can be a little difficult to sit through, the music they have in the background occasionally drives me nuts, and the Hail Marys are said a bit quicker than I'm entirely comfortable with, but the point is that I'm do it! Small victories! I struggle to focus when I do it on my own, so the broadcast is a good thing. 

And that's it for now, dear readers. I'll check back in with you later. 

Yours always,

Tara

Some one ought to open up a window!

It is hot! Wasn't I just talking about it cooling off some? Well, it has, but that doesn't change the fact that it is HOT!

Not ten minutes after I published my morning post, people started showing up! A hither-to unheard of occurrence, that I have been assured will happen more frequently! Never fear, Saturdays with the Saints will continue, mostly because there's no reason for it not to. Still, it'd be nice if they gave me a little heads up on what to expect.

I've been considering a move up North. Not because I particularly want to live in an area that gets snow fall every single year, or live with the higher cost of living (last time I was there, gas cost a whole $1 more a gallon, ouch!), but more because my sister is there, and I'd like to be able to get there quickly if she needs me. She describes depression as being like a bad sprain. Most of the time, it just aches, but every now and then, for no reason at all, it flares up and hurts like crazy.

I try my best to help her, but I'm emotionally challenged, so I don't really understand. Depression makes sense to me only in the abstract, the reality is another matter entirely.

It's moved the chaplet up on my list of things to do though. I don't know how much it would help, but I think it might help some.

Strangely, that seems to be my answer for every problem. Make something. Bake cookies, knit a scarf, string a necklace, make something because that will help somehow. I don't know if it does or not, really, but that seems to be my default way of dealing with things.

I've also broken my self-imposed regulation today. In an effort to cut back on soda, I've instituted a rule that says that for every soda I drink I have to drink a 20oz bottle of something else (usually tea, since I'm very finicky about my water). I'll probably get back to it later on, but right now, I just want to enjoy my cold Cherry Coke.

I'm a little excited. The church I had wanted to go to Sunday does have mass on weekdays. It's just before I drove by, and for some reason, not posted outside. I still have to meet with the priest of the other parish (Did I mention how nervous I am?), but it's still nice to know that the other place is an option as well. It's a really pretty little church, from what I could see, and it had a little Marian grotto, which is something I haven't seen in person since I was in Germany.

Of course, I know nothing about Marian grottoes besides what they look like, but hey! That's what I'm trying to learn, right? Well, that, and about 50 million other little things. I'll be honest, the (long-ish) list of blogs I've been following have been quite helpful, even if they don't know it. Many of them are research nerds, which is a great help to little ole me.

The down side is that my book list (which is already very large) has gotten quite a bit longer.

I finished (well, mostly finished) my first sock about an hour ago. I still have to block it (which is something I've never done before) but I'll finish it's partner up first, then worry about blocking it. It turned out pretty well, although I had to alter the pattern slightly, otherwise the sock would have been way too long!

On the whole though, I'm pretty happy with how today has been going.

Also, I'm implementing a new rule right now, so there's no problem down the road. Simply put, no post on Sundays! In an effort to minimize my time spent on the computer and to devote proper attention where it's due, I will not be blogging on Sundays.

So I will see you all again on Monday, dear readers!

Yours always,
Tara

Enjoy the silence

This, I will admit without guilt, is one of the best times of my day.

Almost everybody has left and the building is quiet. The only sounds are my keyboard, the music on low in the background (today's pick, a collection of Gregorian chants), and the occasional squeak of the wheels on the Ms. L's cart. (Ms. L cleans the building that I work at.) Here in a few minutes, I'll trade the chants for EWTN to listen to Catholic Answers Live. I'll listen, and knit, and maybe I'll finish this sock tonight, though I won't hold my breath.

After these socks, I have to get back to baby knitting for a while, at least until I finish the stuff for Shawna. I've already accepted that I won't have Little Bird's blanket done before she arrives, even if it was the only thing I was working on, so I'm shooting to have it finished by her first birthday.

I'd shoot for Easter, but with the dresses I want to make her for Christmas and Easter, plus the rest of my Christmas knitting, I figure it's best if I shoot for her birthday. Especially since I also have plans for a Barbar the Elephant King plush toy on my list of knits. Sara Elizabeth Kellner over on Ravelry has a number of gorgeous patterns, including the afore mentioned Elephant King. It even comes with instructions for his suit, bowler hat, royal cape, and crown! How cool is that?

I was thinking about adding a little fun to my Saturdays, boring as they are, by doing a little research into a random saint each Saturday. I have a site that will randomly generate a saint, and if you click the link it tells you more about them. I've always loved the saints stories, even before I considered the Catholic church, so it should be fun.

I also have an enormous knitting list, and a few things on my crochet list. I'm not as fond of crochet, mainly because I'm not as comfortable with it. Probably because I struggle not to crochet too tightly.

It's also a little intimidating because I'm not as familiar with it as I am with knitting. I get so confused with crochet. Especially the really delicate stuff, like fine lace. Knitted lace I can do. Crochet is a different story.

For all that I love my job, there are a number of things about it that drive me nuts! It's like these people have no idea exactly what information is actually needed for me to do my job! I'm not asking for much, but it'd be nice to know what's going on at any given time! And none of what I'd like to make my job easier is hard! Most of it is common sense!

Which makes it all the more obvious why I love the quiet time of day. None of my usual worries, just how best to kill time until I can go home.

Let me know what you think about my idea for Saturdays.

Yours always,
Tara

I hate phone calls

Few things are worse than having to make a phone call.

Seriously! You have no idea how grateful I was when Papa John's started online ordering! No phone calls necessary! I hate calling people. I literally have to take a deep breath, and psyche myself up for it. I rehearse what I'm going to say, and try my hardest not to let the person on the other end of the line know that I feel sick with nerves! 

It's not like talking to new people! Surprisingly, I'm usually pretty good at that. But I have phone anxiety like you wouldn't believe! Family, of course, is an exception, but, as my good friend Cas put it "I've seen you about to fall out over ordering a pizza!"

So I called the Cathedral office and one of the local parishes today, since I still hadn't heard from anyone. The Cathedral said they'll call me back. The priest at the local parish is meeting with me Tuesday morning, so we can discuss this in person. It's the same parish I'm planning on attending Friday morning, and it's also the same one my friend Hale's father attends. 

Hale's the "wiccan". 

What can I say, I have weird friends. 

My point though! I hate phone calls, feel incredibly awkward when I have to make them, and would much rather just text, or email, or even snail-mail! At least then I wouldn't stumble over my words.

Moving on, I'm about a third of the way through my first sock. I just finished the heel flap and am about to start the heel itself. I'm honestly not sure how well they'll fit, but even if they don't, at least I'll have made them. And I'll have something to go off of for future reference. 

I'll still be a little heartbroken though. I really do love socks. Especially fun ones. These ones are pretty cool, if a bit of a pain to make (I feel like an octopus trying to juggle all those darn needles! Six needles at any given time, dear readers!). I still need to finish the pair of booties I made for Shawna. It won't take more than three minutes, I just don't feel like doing it right now. 

So, Friday I'm going to one parish, Sunday I'm going to a different one, and honestly, the one I'm visiting Friday will probably be the one I go to more frequently, based on the mass schedule. I still really love going to the Cathedral, and I think there might be one more parish close by that I can look into. 

I've never wanted to live in the North East near my sister, entirely based off my dislike for cold weather (which is completely understandable, dear reader, as I have a hard time warming up after I get cold) but right now, I wouldn't mind so much, because it'd probably be easier to find someone to meet with! 

My impatience is getting the best of me, I think. Do any of you have any tips, or suggestions on how to deal with it?

Yours always,

Tara

Knit, purl, and juggle needles

Knitting socks on double points.

Sorry, let me be more specific.

Knitting socks with cables on double points.

I'm also having to read a chart (properly! not the way I do when I knit squares for Little Bird's blanket) and use my row-counter!

So far, I have the cuff, and about two inches of the leg done on one of my yellow socks. It's actually been fairly easy thus far, but I haven't even gotten started on the heel and let's be honest, that's the entire reason I haven't tried doing this earlier. Books just say "turn the heel" and yeah, that should probably be a bit obvious, but I'm teaching myself! Have I mentioned how thankful I am for youtube?

I'll probably be working on these socks tonight, tomorrow, and part of Saturday. Which isn't really bad. And these are a bit more complicated than what I have planned for the men in my life, so those should take less time.

Well, except H's. The kid has feet like Big-foot! I feel completely justified in calling him Sasquatch!

Friday I'm going to try a different parish, see how I like it, and Sunday I'll be going to the one I'd planned on attending today, God willing.

I'm not a very patient person, so this waiting is driving me crazy. If I need to talk to my boss, I'd like to find out as soon as possible.

Another reason I'm so impatient is because I have questions, and no one to ask! I need information! I'm curious! Have you ever seen a book-worm when she can't get the information she needs? It's not pretty! Sadly, I have limited access to the library due to my schedule and proximity, plus, a limited budget (and more books than I have room for already!) means I can't just go out and buy every book that looks interesting!

"But Tara," you ask, "don't you have friends who are Catholic?"

Technically, yes. But the one (who shall hence-forth be known exclusively as my sister, regardless of biology or legality) lives miles and miles away and can't always pick up the phone. She's also a little scatter-brain and forgets to call me back for months at a time. The other is, well, she says she's a wiccan. Given her personality and staunch defense of the church when people are being ignorant, I generally interpret that as "I'm hurt, and upset, and need some time before I head home", if that makes any sense at all. She also has two small children who need her time far more than I do. And that's it. That's pretty much the extent of it.

Truly, this isn't surprising. In a world with roughly 7.8 billion people, I only have 5 that I consider close friends. I'm not exactly Ms. Social-butterfly.

Not that I don't want more friends, but talking to people isn't exactly my forte. I'm the person that says "Excuse me" five times and still isn't heard.

I guess I could always ask Shawna, but given that she converted to Baptist (hence how I know her) that probably won't help me any.

She's the one I was making the baby booties for. She's nice enough, but she's more outgoing than I am, and tends to be a little more...normal than I am.

Not that there's anything wrong with normal, I'm just not it. I mean, when you consider the fact that my idea of the perfect day is sitting in bed, with a good book, a cup of tea, a movie on stand-by, some knitting in case I need a break from reading, and anything from the Top 40 Countdown to Gregorian chants playing just loud enough to be heard over the pouring rain.....as opposed to a lot of people my age who pack the clubs down-town on Friday and Saturday nights....you see where I *might* have a hard time interacting with my peers.

Sure, there are other people out there like me, but the problem is that they're like me! Which means that we're all standing against the wall, trying to make ourselves as small and unnoticeable as humanly possible, spending large amounts of time inside, and reveling in how easy the internet makes it to find what we want without having to leave home.

"But Tara, you love to travel!"
And this, gentle reader, is the strange part. The more people I'm traveling with, the less I enjoy it, and the more I act like my normal self. But if it's just me and one, maybe two other people, I am Indiana Jones! Bold, adventurous, and unstoppable!

Ah well, maybe sometime in the near future, I'll be able to go back to Europe for a while. I never did make it to Wittenberg, and I'd like to visit the UK (and maybe see the Loch Ness Monster?).

Until tomorrow, dear readers,
Tara

Starting my day off right

I love going to mass in the mornings.

Of course, this love will probably be slightly lessened during the winter, when I'm struggling to keep warm, even while wearing four or more layers, but even so.

It's not the weather that makes it enjoyable, after all.

I love the quiet, the peace of it all. And the fact that there aren't as many people there. What can I say? Crowds and I do not work well together.

Probably because I'm short, and people attempt to step on me.

I ended up going to the cathedral this morning. I couldn't find out when the more local parish held mass, and given that I wasn't exactly sure where they were, I figured it was best to go where I knew. Turned out for the best anyway. I drove by them on my way home, to make sure that I knew, for future reference, where they were. Didn't see anything about weekday mass services at all. Just Saturday, Sunday, and Holy Days.

I might still go on Sunday, since it is closer, but I really do enjoy morning mass on Wednesdays.

This is the second week I've gotten up early to go to mass on Wednesday. Brings my grand total of attendances to four. It seems like I've been more frequently, though that's probably because of how often I've stopped by the cathedral.

I keep hoping I'll hear from someone soon. I enjoy going to mass, but I feel a little out of place. There's a lot about it that I don't know, or don't understand. What I wouldn't give for a primer!

Ideally, it would be a smallish book, something easy to travel with. Inside, it would include church etiquette, mass structure, prayers, greetings and responses, titles and a basic job description, common terms (candidate, diocese, ect), and an FAQ section.

I know, a lot of info to try and squeeze into a tiny book, but still! I'm not asking for the Vatican library! (although, as any good bibliophile and history lover, I do have the greatest admiration for the keepers of that truly spectacular collection)

Like I said, it'd be nice to have a pocket reference guide.

I need to pick up another skein of the yellow yarn I bought yesterday, and then I'm taking a break from baby knitting to try socks! It's a top down pattern, same as the Irish Ale socks. I figured it'd be a good way to practice.

Yours always,
Tara